Oh My Days! What a completely useless attempt at streamlining my blokeys! Even G won't accept being sent to Coventry, and keeps sending plaintive texts and emails in the middle of the night.
But enough of him! Compared to Ade he is an open book that fits easily on the back of a postage stamp.
We last saw Ade nearly two weeks ago, reading my misdirected text. The next day I texted to ask him to let me know as soon as he had seen the funny side. No such undertaking was received and consequently I was forced to spend the weekend feeling stupid.
But then... on Monday at work he almost bounded over to me as I hung about smoking a fag with some other colleagues. I did an Oscar nominated portrayal of sheepishness, but discreetly I hope so nobody else would spot the painful social intercourse we had shared. Lots of big contrite eyes and an "ulp!" type mouth shape, I like to think. "Hello People!" was his opening gambit, directed only at me.
To my amazement he started blah-ing on about how he can't cope with having to do his end-of-term reports on computer and could I offer some
personal tuition. He suggested some obviously ridiculous times when this might be possible during working hours, which I couldn't agree to because I wasn't there at those times. Frustrated, he said maybe he could bring his laptop round to mine one evening. I was so surprised I nearly fell over.
What the......? What the.......? I've no idea how this guy's mind works.
THEN.... he went quiet for a week, though I texted to ask him when he intended to do this thing. I reckon he wimped out.
BUT THEN.... tonight I texted him with some light-hearted nonsense. And what does he do? And what does he freaking do??
He called me back, like actual voice call, and with such promptness that the £200 he was in the process of withdrawing from a cash machine got sucked back in, causing him to swear in an adorable public school gone bad type way.
He asked me to choose between tomorrow and Wednesday evening to Sort Him Out. He was so assertive and - yes -
manly about it that it activated my coy and reluctant circuit and I said I had to check some stuff before I could give my answer. He told me to text him tomorrow and tell him, and that if I wanted to offer a chilled bottle of wine, that would be fine. Chilled, mind you.
Its all quite sexy and thrilling, and maybe he'll wimp out again tomorrow when I respond with my husky "Yess", but how are things panning out in that worn-but-still-handsome head of his? Answers on the back of a postage stamp please.
